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Home » 4 Lies that Keep Sabotaging Your Relationships

4 Lies that Keep Sabotaging Your Relationships

August 22, 2014 by Olivia

Woman lie

The average man lies as much as 1000 times within a single year. Women lie a bit less than most men, but make no mistake about it girls–we delve out our share of white elephants. The biggest problem with these lies is not the damage they do to others, but the damage you are doing to yourself. These are the four worst lies you tell yourself that continue to sabotage your relationships.

1. I need the approval of men to be worthy

You want to be liked by men, because it makes you feel good. Some women convince themselves that their personality is not what a man is looking for, so they mold themselves to resemble what they think he wants. The problem is that your real self is much more interesting than your dumbed-down twin, so you only end up working against your best interest. If you build your character around satisfying men, you will surely sabotage the needs of one of the most important people in your life–you.

2. Love must fall into place the way I want it to, otherwise I will not be happy

Countless studies have shown that what we say we want–is often not what really makes us happy. Having a list of things you want in a partner is important. It helps you to organize your priorities, and discover certain red flags you might have otherwise missed. However, if you allow your goals to dictate your happiness, you are setting yourself up for a very long life of misery. Joy does not come from a set of rules; it comes from finding a peace inside your heart that allows you to find happiness no matter with who (or where) you are.

3. In order to find love, I must sacrifice myself

You’ve probably experienced the feeling of losing a guy over a list of things that you were not willing to be or do. If you get enough of these rejections, eventually you begin to think that in order to achieve a successful relationship, you may need to sacrifice some things. This is good, because any intimate relationship requires compromise. However, if you end up sacrificing too much in order to enhance the lives of your partner, you’ll end up creating a very unfortunate clause in your happily ever after.

4. It’s too late for me

There are two times in a woman’s life when it is actually too late to find a good man. When you die, and when you decide you no longer have a chance. The problem with this thinking, is that you are only lying to yourself to excuse the fact that you are really too scared to succeed. In other words, you fear failure so much, that you would rather not try and blame it on a lack of time. However, I have a better approach for you to try. When you procrastinate from doing something, it is the same thing as quietly admitting that you are a failure. If you think of it that way, considering that failure is one of life’s greatest horrors–it is better to try, and learn from your experiences, than admit you have already become what it is you fear the most.

Long story short: It is never too late to change your life for the better.

 

Filed Under: Feature, Relationships Tagged With: dating, dating advice, lying, relationships

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