Attracting a quality man is not a switch that you turn on and off. It is a state of confidence that should stay with you no matter where you are, or what you’re doing. The first rule of playing hard to get, which should be more important than any other, is that love cannot be scheduled, so you must be ready for it at all times. This is sometimes a hard concept to grasp for many women, considering her busy schedule. A girl bustles about her daily activities, organizing her time for work, play, and getting her flirt on at the local pub. She is sometimes so intent on getting to her destination, she forgets that getting there should be half the fun!
Here are a few tips on playing hard to get, that aren’t too hard, but will definitely make it easier for you to get:
Does Playing Hard to Get Work? Yes, But…
Make Him Work for it
Daters like the thrill of the chase. It is embedded in our biology as hunters. When you are with your date, give him your full attention and interest, but don’t give away too much. Women have the tendency to share too much about themselves when they feel close to a guy. It is better to reveal yourself gradually, allowing a continued mystery to keep a guys interest throughout the introductory stages of dating. Too much too soon is like kryptonite to any super-guy.
Don’t Make Him Work Too Hard
While men prefer to work for a woman’s company, he is also inherently lazy. Never confuse hard to get with darn near impossible, or a guy will quickly lose interest. The best way to make a guy work at a relationship, is playing what is known as selectively hard to get. This means, while you may not be impossible for him to achieve, he knows most other guys would not fall under the same grace. In other words, guys like to know they have come farther then most, which gives them incentive to keep working towards the prize.
All’s Fair in Love and Influence
They say opposites attract, but in truth, most men prefer to relate to a woman they have things in common with. In the ageless book, How to Win Friends and Influence People, Carnegie talked about U.S. President Roosevelt. The President would stay up for hours before receiving a guest, researching the topics he knew would interest them. Before going on a first date, there is nothing wrong with taking some time to acquaint yourself with some of the pursuits your date is involved with. Creating a connection with a partner does not always occur naturally. Most of the time we have to work at it. This is known as building chemistry, and it is something that we have to do throughout our lifetime to keep connecting to our partner’s ever-changing interests and goals.
Red Light Special
Your appearance is very important. However, beyond fashion itself, studies show that a woman wearing red will receive more attention, then when wearing any other color (blue, red, green, etc.). The researchers speculate it may have something to do with our link to primates, and the tendency for receptive females to turn a bright red. Regardless of its biology, it works… so don’t be afraid to add a few splashes of red in your wardrobe.
Get His Heart Racing
Considering that true intimacy takes time to build, part of your task should be to put time on your side. Most men read too much into a first date, deciding whether or not they will continue their pursuit within the initial minutes of meeting. You can create a temporary boost to your connection by using a first date plan that involves a heart racing experience, such as an action packed 3D movie, or amusement park. The idea is that the adrenaline involved in these activities, simulates sexual excitement, boosting your attractiveness. You want somebody to love you as you are, but you also need time for him to discover that.
These rules of attraction are all about giving you the chance to create a connection with a man before he chalks you off. True chemistry, is just that. A bond created within our mind and body, that involves a combination of hormones, memories, experience, and intuition. Discovering true chemistry in a relationship takes time, so don’t be afraid to work at it. Love at first sight is often merely infatuation, and not the main ingredient to a 50 year marriage.